The Gentleman versus Players annual cricket match was a highlight for many in the Victorian era. This week it was reproduced in all its glory by Torrance House. Wilfred Rhodes was a player. In the last 3 seasons of Queen Victoria’s reign he took 725 wickets and also took up batting in his spare time scoring a maiden century at number 9. He rested by playing versus the Gentleman. I can say with assurance that if he had turned up to play us on his own yesterday he would have won. I think he would have scored something in the region of 200 not out (4 runs an over, no risk) and then bowled us out for about 25. Luckily we were only playing 11 men from Dumfries.

We won the toss, and the democratically elected leader of the gentlemen’s club politely asked them to bat. To show our status we then proceeded to fuss about making sure they were catered for in the drinks department, all our teas were efficiently given to the ladies to serve for us, and the grounds man was humoured for providing us with a lovely facility for us to pursue our leisurely past time.

We then politely dropped 4 dollies, and apologised to everyone else for doing so, knowing deep down that to catch a man before he has scored and had time for a little fun, is just not the way of things.

In true gentleman’s style we then decide that we needed a wicket, and the best way was for one of us to politely ask the umpire. The opening bowler was nominated, as he has a charming smile and genteel manners. As we expected the umpire obliged, and we were now well into them. A couple more polite requests after the Pimms break also helped us, and we even rather rudely caught one of them out. He was unlucky though to find somebody available, because at the time we only had 9 players on the field as the good doctor was attending to the opening bowlers poorly ankle, which he had injured when one of the Players had rather savagely attacked him by hitting a cricket ball in his general direction. Eventually the Players finished on 175 ish, which was nothing to worry about as we could indulge in a fantastic tea.

In fact tea was so nice it hardly seemed proper to resume from it. So we didn’t really. The Players however did, and with a careless disregard for our fun they opened the bowling with a slow man, and after 4 balls we were nought for 2 , with both men out stumped. A nice little bit of biffing later on took us past 60 in no time with some glorious stroke play, and we managed to all get back in the pavilion without any real exertion or breaking sweat. An early finish was ideal as there were sandwiches to finish off and a nice chat to be had with the jovial guys who had defeated us in such an honourable way. The very respectable umpires who had appreciated our manners with a couple of nice decisions also joined us for a drink and it all ended rather well.

Man of the Match – Not awarded this week – We are Gentleman after all and all think we deserve it.
Shot of the Day – Nothing by us – We are Gentleman after all and everything we do we think is stylish.
Ball of the Day – S Mann – We dropped it
Quote of the Day – Lord Paul the Third of Manchip - “It was like she was been fed Red Bull on an intravenous drip"
Note for Posterity – Wilf has now kept wicket for 138 overs in his career and conceded 10 byes. 4 due to errors on his part, the other 6 being errors of the umpires who should have signaled 4 leg byes and 2 wide.
Footnote: Check this out for a contrast. http://www.pitchero.com/clubs/eastkilbridecc/news/league-title-won-by-northern-professionals-165385.html