Holmes Chapel 1st XV finished the season in superb fashion last weekend with a last gasp 20-18 victory over a strong Crewe & Nantwich 3s outfit away from home. The game was a topsy-turvy affair that could have gone either way, however the boys in Blue & Gold stuck to their task and ended up coming home with the spoils. Jed Wragg scored the team's only try of the afternoon but it was Andy Davies's kicking that really made the difference (even if he did need a second attempt for one of them!).

Read the match report here or pick up a copy of the Crewe Chronicle or Knutsford Guardian.

This win completes a fantastic season for Chapel, having lost only 3 games in the 2015/16 campaign. Congratulations to everyone involved in the achievement.

Rugby isn't quite done for the year - the boys are entering a side into the Sandbach 7s tournament on 21 May, with a second training session to take place next weekend at the Community Centre.

2nd XV

More exciting news on the playing side...

Chapel are taking the next step in their development as they look to field two sides each week next season.

New players of all standard aged 17 or over are very welcome and should contact club. Dates of pre-season training to be announced soon.

Nominations for captaincy will be voted on at the AGM. Ability to down pints and rally the troops considered far more important than ability to play rugby.

Vets XV aka The Ancients

No more games for the Ancients this season so the lads plan to go back into hibernation for the summer. Of course, we'll see a few of them on tour, and at the Campout, and then - if they're foolish enough - at pre-season training!

Any Ancients who fancy playing more regularly should keep an eye out for updates on 2nd XV plans. We would love to get some of our old boys playing more often and showing our youngsters the tricks of the trade.

Some Other Stuff

The author would love to bring you some additional features, packed with interesting, informative and humorous content, but obviously that would mean delegating the role to someone else.

So for this week, you'll have to make do with the weather forecast for Orlando, Florida.

Scorchio!!!

Ask El Tel

More expert advice from everyone's favourite Agony Uncle.

El Tel

I am having a very serious problem and I honestly think you're the only one who can help me. I keep reliving the same day over and over again and it's getting beyond a joke. The worst thing is, every time I wake up in the morning I realise I'm not 6 foot 7 and 17 stone after all and still a little blonde boy resembling the leprechaun from the Lucky Charms box.

The whole thing reminds me of a film I once saw...I think it might have been called Judgement Day? Or was it Ground Control? I get mixed up quite easily you see. Anyway, seeing as I seem to be stuck with this affliction, maybe you could offer me some advice to make the best of it?

Little Groundhog, Holmes Chapel

Dear Algie

It can be very disturbing when you wake up and the world seems the same unless of course you are TOW sleeping on the 0600 red eye to Manchester, ATOW on another stag weekend, Come On doing Tough Mudder (did you know he does TM he keeps it quiet!). or Spadehands looking longingly at cows udders… By the way don’t tell Spadey that you look like the leprechaun from Lucky Charms, he adores Lucky Charms and may eat you…

Now most films are exactly the same each time you watch them, even if like the Aussies you hope every time you replay the 2003 World Cup final you still believe Johnny “walks on water” Wilko is going to miss that drop kick. But we know where you are going… It would of course be helpful when we go on tour as we would know where the Wibbly Wobbly Weeble is and we can go straight there and get down to serious drinking. We would know where the Entertainments Officer is going to fall asleep, we could and would continually laugh at DSTVBs always being DSTVBs. Mind you that happens each year with Cheshire Housewives favourite barman anyway…

To my mind it sounds great, you would be able to learn which response you could give to your WAG when she asks you just how drunk you are and what time do you think it is, as “very” and “late” don’t quite seem to work… but then neither does dropping compliments such as “you look nicer than the barmaid love”, “you got a lovely rolling pin in your hand darling” or “you are wonderful to stay up and cook me supper love, is it ready?”… You could also work out your beer tipping point. You know the bit where you seem to think every lady in the room has suddenly realised how attractive you are, how they seem to understand your slurring and ignore the dribbling and sick on your shoes, and they are queueing to go home with you… whereas in fact they are all having to get past you to get to the exit and the taxi asap, and are simply smiling because they haven’t got a clue what the hell you are saying…

However as for being the Joe Launchbury look alike ~ Dream on kiddo!

Speak soon

El Tel

Desert Island Ovals

This week, Shopping / Holidays Enthusiast Garry Cottam brings us his 8 favourite records:

All Along the Trafford Centre - Jimi Hendrix
Xante Calling - The Clash
Somebody Sold Me - The Killers
(Another) Holiday - Madonna
All you need is Visa - Beatles
Leaving On A Jet Plane - John Denver
Money for Shopping - Dire Straits
Blame It On The Duty Free - The Jacksons

CD available now priced at only £49.99!!! Please make cheques payable to the Transform Andy Partington into a 7s Maestro Fund.

Meetings, Socials & Key Dates

Coming Soon! The Big HCRUFC End of Season Do, The Vic Club, Saturday 14 May.

Not many tickets left - get in quick!!!

Sandbach 7s Training, HC Community Centre, 7 and 14 May
The Big HCRUFC End of Season Do, The Vic Club, Saturday 14 May
AGM, The Vic Club, Friday 3 June
Hands Up for Jonny Wilkinson’s Right Boot (play), The Vic Club, Saturday 4 June
Tour, (Near) Barcelona, 10-13 June
The Big HCRUFC Campout, venue to be confirmed, Saturday 9 July
The Big HCRUFC Bike Ride to Twickenham, various roads, 23-26 November

Links

Facebook
Twitter