Coombs for a number of years has had no skill, yet once dared to wear a pair of white boots. What he lacks in skill he makes up for with force - and is well known for his tacking and physicality in the back row (more at 6 than 7 since the pace has gone). He enjoys tackling with his face - using the massive 'ledge' forehead that he has.

He is Old Gs through and through, having played for the junior section many moons ago and for the senior sides since his teenage years. His fetish for spreadsheets means that he is also currently club treasurer. He was also 1st XV captain for a number of years, leading the side to Kent Vase triumph and promotion to the London Leagues.

He spared a minute of his time....

Name: Matthew Coomber

Age: 30 (despite being often mistaken for 40)

Previous clubs: OGRFC minis then a brief stint at Gravesend as a teenager.

Favourite film
I find it very difficult to choose one. I like Tarantino, with Pulp Fiction being a pretty epic film.

Favourite food
I am partial to a Three Bean Salad with Quinoa. Really hits the spot after a hard fought battle on the pitch. Back in the real world, probably curry, any type with a bit of spice.

Who is your hero/idol?
Coomber No 1 (Paul). Because, well, he is Coomber No 1.

Favourite rugby moment
Captaining the side that won promotion to the London Leagues (I forget what happened the next season). That or winning the Kent Cup with the final act of the game being me actually kicking the ball into touch - first time and last.

Person you would most like to be at Old Gs and why
Anyone with pace, size or skill all of which I’m lacking.

Person you would least like to be at Old Gs and why
Becky, poor girl.

Best player you have played with
There was one fella, went by the name of Warren he did, turned up one day and taught us all a thing or two about rugby. Unfortunately, never got to play with him. Marcus D’Cunha did some special things on the field back in the day.

Professional rugby player you would compare yourself to
Richard Hill – mainly because he has an incredibly thick skull.

If you were not a rugby player what would you be?
Less broken, less ugly, less in the dog house with the mrs. Sporting wise, probably a professional golfer considering my natural ability with a set of golf sticks. Locky will attest to that.

Interesting fact about you that no one at Old Gs knows
Both my parents are of African descent and I really am an albino. I am also a world record holder.

Which actor/actress would play you in a film about your life?
I have been compared to a few in my time – Sloth from The Goonies, Rocky Dennis from The Mask and the lesser known Big Brother contestant Darnell (the albino). Any of them would do.

(if you had to) Which 3 Old Gs players would you take to a remote desert island with you…and why?
Would have to be my fellow dirt towers crew (Loz, Holdy, Bassett) as we were pretty inventive with coming up with novel ways of amusing ourselves with limited resource. Kick the cork. Power cut fights. Eyes closed, throw a ball at your nuts game and many more.