An we have been dotting all over the place, I decided that instead of pissin aboot trying to find oot which restaurant was next, and then Ringing them and finding out that they wouldn't give us the free popadoms, that I'd just pick one...... And the one I picked was the top of the table international tandoori.

Soon as I spoke to the guy on the phone, he remembered us from the last time and totally said path at heed sort us oot with the pops and pickles. No hummin and harring, no messin, just eye, book it for 9:30, and see ya later. Hi Fukin five.

Now there wasn't that many that rsvp'd for the night, and a few that did didn't show. Eye the usual suspect, tronny said he was comin but never showed (just like last month) and flame haired dean black also was MIA. Still, the attendance was boosted when Jeff and Evan just turned up for training grinning like fuk, straight away I knew the were comin for the curry after.

So we meets in the marine. Eye it's not great, but it's closer to the international than the pier, and at least when ya in ya can hear each other speak. The pier is shit, same owld karaoke singers every time we go in, and the twats aren't getting any better. Speaking of karaoke, a can't wait to burn the stage doon in the karaoke bar on the strip!

Macca only turns up smart as a Fukin dart. A stark change from how he normally looks on curry night. Turns oot his lass is away for the week with the kids. "Anybody want to go to Roxanne's?" What a tart!

So, the crowd was still quite a small one, only nine in attendance, but it was a good nine to be fair. Smudge, cat, pops, macca, spoon, stu, Brashy, Jeff, Evan and Stuey.

Ropa turned up looking rather thin. The poor lad had been bad for a few days, in hospital and all that. He looked well for it to be fair, turns out he has been on a diet and his body had a reaction to not having had a pizza for 2 days. But it will al be worth it when he's wearing his cardigan/speedo combination in a few weeks.

Now usually, on a thurdsay night the curry shops are a bit empty, like last month we were the inky fukas in the star. But the international was heaving. We actually had to stand for a good 45 seconds at the bar waiting for our table to get sorted. Then quick as a flash we were sittin doon and gettin wu beers and popadoms on.

had to check the website for what I got the last time we were in there, and I just ordered the same again. Now Ropa, still on his diet, was drinking still spring water instead of the usual cobra. Then He only tries to order fish fingers and chips? The waiter told him it's not Macdonalds, and he had to make do with scampi. Scampi? Fukin scampi on a curry night, he must be hoping to be sporting a thong on holiday.

For wu Starters me and brash had the stuffed pepper cranked up to the spicy max. Smudger had a nibble on Kathy's kebab. A can't remember what anyone else got, apart from Stuey's chicken tikka. Starters were cany I thought. So there we are, sitting waiting for wu mains and putting the world to rights, and macca pipes up with another pearler

"I think" he says in the way that only he can, "I think I'm gonna have a few sunbed sessions before we go away!?" Fukin what? Sunbed? Pardon? Did I hear you right? Few sunbed sessions? Whey eye, that's perfectly normal. Why doesnt he get a spray tan and a vest and see if ya can get on the next season of Geordie shore? He was rightly ridiculed to within an inch of his life.

After that revelation, it seemed seconds and the mains were arriving. Whey I'm gonna have to say that it was lush to the max. Infact everyone cleared their plate. Not a single but was left owa so I guess ya gotta put ya hand up and say that it was top notch like. Even smudge ate all his and he's usually a right budgie.

When the bill came api have to say that I thort we got stitched a bit. Like tee they gave up the free popadoms and pickles. But they seemed to not put any of us on the special menu. Like eye, there was a few lads gettin summit not on the special, but most of us did. Like it came to a kick in the arse off £200, which meant that nowt went in the kitty.

Naturally that effected the scoring, or It did on my behalf anyways. Service was cany. Sorted us with the free popadoms and the place was chocka so it wasnt as if they needed the punters. Shit hot gettin the bait oot to us anarl and so am gonna go 9 out of 10 as we had to wait 45 seconds for the table. Bait, ten oot of ten, it was lush and the 9 clean plates are hard to argue with. But value for money am gonna have to go for a 4 out of 10. Free popadoms and it was still £25 each? Na, they have had our eyes out there liked so it gets a cat score of 23, a decent score really. The average of the 5 lads that voted was 24, so that would put the international into 5th if it didn't already have the top spot.

The handsome lads will be In Portugal for the last Thursday in June, so spooner and Stuey will have their own curry night. Tronny might come along anarl as it looks like he's not coming away!