Festive Light Blues Fixture Frollics

This report is brought to you by the letters M, P & D for “Marty” and “Party” and “Damo”. Here is what he has to say, listen carefully children for he is a Wise Owl:

I have written my account of yesterday. It's a bit Damien Camm heavy, but if no one has written anything else I think it could work as a match report. Maybe. Feel free to tinker with it or put it in the bin (NOPE)

From the moment I turned up at Vipers rugby club, I knew Damo meant business. 'The Business' in question was 'doing all the rugbys, really really well'.

Unfortunately not every Athletic man fancied The Business, with examples throughout the game of; dropping every ball that came their way*, not making any real effort to catch the ball from a kick off in case a large man smashed them,* and finally, doing an impression of a matador/turnstile when the big/fast Light Blue player ran at them (Olé!!) *.

In comparison, Damo continually put his taped hand up for the team; doing the hard yards in attack, belting people in defense and offering tactical wisdom such as, "lets do a Damo Ball".

The flow of the game went back and forth, with both teams enjoying some positive play and scoring multiple rugbys. After quick play from Sam (a scrumhalf we borrowed) and the forwards, Dai powered under the sticks to open The Aths account for the afternoon. This was shortly followed by the aforementioned Sam, who went over after the pack won a 5m scrum against the head. In the second half we realised that Rob (one of our loaned centres) was really strong and really fast, so we gave him the ball and he scored. In hindsight, we should have done that sooner and more often. Our penultimate try came from Henry, another Light Blue who was kind enough to lend a hand to The Ath. After a 5m lineout, Henry went burrowing like a naked mole-rat and came up with the five points. We may have scored some others, but I honestly can't remember. I've been hit in the head too many times.

To their credit, the Light Blues were in the lead for most of the game. Their majestic, seasoned pack played with power and skill, which nicely complimented the pace of their backs and lead to them scoring many fine rugbys. However, as full time approached there were calls of "next try is the winner" from our side, and I'm pretty sure that none of them disagreed...

In the final minutes of the game, Dai once again called out for us to concentrate on having fun, but as I glanced towards Damo I saw that he had other things on his mind. The glint in his eyes said: 'There's no time for fun, now it's Business Time'.

After multiple phases and with the clock ticking down, Damo hit a sweet angle off the ten, slammed into two Light Blues players and promptly cut through the defensive line like a cheese knife through baked camembert. With his trademark 'low knee drive, high cadence' running gait, he looked like a ferocious Benny Hill during a closing chase scene. With the subtle zigs and zags of his 30m break confusing the covering Light Blues defense, they only caught up with him as he went over the try line - touching the ball down behind his head in the style of a reverse dunk that Vince Carter would be proud of. Technically this 'last try' won us the game. Or maybe rugby was the winner. Or maybe the Light Blues actually won because they had more points than us at the end of the game. You decide.

Afterwards Huw gave a lovely speech thanking the Light Blues for having us and more importantly lending us some really good players. This made the game competitive and fun for all. I would also like to thank the Light Blues for supplying Domino's pizza for the post match food.

A very Merry Athmas to all.

Damo has this to say:
Today's game was awesome even though we lost rugby was the winner.
Highlights in no particular order.

1 Dai BUYING THE DUMMY
2 The higest tackle ever resulting in a yellow card but no penalty try.
3 forwards try from a scrum against the head.
4 High tackle from the bull dozer resulting in a yellow card. (Sak was tired and needed a rest).
5. Did i mention Dai bought a Dummy from probably their slowest player.
6. The Damo ball working at the lineout.
7 Them conceding a penalty for dropping the C bomb.

Credit to the blues they lent us some very good players and made it a real contest.

Pitchside Pundit and purveyor of oranges, Craig Steven’s elaborated:
5 mins before [the event] the ref got in the way of a ball that was popped to [Damo] on the 5m line and he would have been clean in. After telling the ref (and everyone else) that he "stopped my try" A pass was given to Damo around 30m out, he hit the gap and everything opened up for him. With too light blues players bearing down on him, were they going to catch him?
NOT TODAY said the man as he carried an opposition player over the line with him to the delight of the spectators Damo rose to his knees and yelled out something reminiscent of a scene from Platoon.

* Crimes against 'The Business' perpetrated solely by me (Marty).