Crick Lions CC v Welford CC – Aug 2021

The water steadily dripped off the peak of his cap down on to his pale, near-blue, hands. He looked down at his counter. Still five balls remaining in the over. He couldn’t believe it. “Five balls remaining to stand out here watching these blithering buffoons playing a summer sport in monsoon conditions. I didn’t sign up for this”, he thought to himself. “This is ridiculous. They’re bound to call it off at the end of the over”. The end of the over came. And so did the next. And the one after that. But the cricketers wouldn’t come off. So determined were they to get every ounce of cricket out of a pitch that had so far held up finely given the biblical precipitation. “Jeez, how much longer do these cricket-worshipping nutters want to stay out here for?”, the umpire muttered as he put his umbrella up as if to drop a not-so-subtle hint.
Finally, the opposition captain, a yappy Brummie who’d been optimistically drying the ball with a wet towel for the last 10 overs, yielded to the elements. “Maybe we’ll take a break guys, it’ll blow over in five minutes and we’ll be back on to finish”, he shouted through the horizontal rain as he wrung a washing-machine load of water out of the towel. At last, thought the umpire as he tucked the umbrella under his arms and dashed off with the players. “Get to the pub lads quick before they get us back out there”, he cried to his fellow Welfordians. They never did come back on.

In a bizarre ending, the rain thwarted a fifth game in six weekends, however Crick claimed a 6-run victory on the DLS method (although we didn’t tell Welford this). The foundations of the win, Crick’s first at the CCG, were built on a solid partnership between two of its more senior citizens, Bomber (22) and Pete Grant (28*), the latter of whom retired hurt but came back in with his side in dire straits at 97-9 off 28 overs. Bomber batted stubbornly throughout to provide stability at one end, whilst Pete, batting with a runner, heroically counter-attacked in the final overs, on one occasion hopping down the wicket to smash the bowler back over his head to the boundary.

Although everyone contributed (apart from the skipper), Crick couldn’t stem the flow of wickets, and the first to go was Steve Exton (11) who got us off to a good start. Although it was a lovely day for ducks, there was only one playing cricket this week and that was Mark Jones (0), caught by his own teammate (more on that later). Bobby Brooke (13) smashed three boundaries before missing one on the stumps. Nathan Grant (3) was LBW to an accurate yorker, and Dave Allen (1) got a good one that jagged back in. Mike Rodley (8) was on the offensive before spooning one back to the bowler. Marcus Wilson (5), batting for the first time in an eternity, played a lovely shot to get off the mark but was out to a superb catch, whilst Charlie Gibbins (11) played with his usual flair.
In strode Pally Brooke with her game face on. She didn’t mess about, pulling the ball to the boundary off a fast bowler, igniting roars, cheers and applause from afar. Unfortunately, her innings soon ended when she sent the ball straight to square leg, but at least she got shot of the day!
Bomber and Pete’s batting carried the team (and Pete needed to be carried off by the team after) to a competitive total of 144 off 40 overs. However, the culprit for two of Crick’s wickets was a Crick man himself, playing for Welford on an emergency-loan, Rocky. The pint-sized Sri Lankan unforgivably caught his captain and ran his regular opening partner Bomber out in slow motion, with an under-arm throw at the stumps off the very last ball of the innings. Mark, umpiring, was all too happy to put the finger up. This meant that Pete was the last man standing (although standing is probably not the most suitable description to use).

Originally not in the Crick XI, this week’s special mention goes to a slightly more able-bodied Frazer Grant, who was ready and willing to step into the action to relieve his old man, coming on as a fielding replacement during the interval. Thankfully, Frazer travels the country with a spare pair of cricket whites in his car, after all, you never know when a cricket match is going to spontaneously break out down the fruit and veg aisle in Tesco, or at a motorway service station.
The second innings started just as the first finished, with Rocky taking centre stage, this time facing the fizz of Nathan’s bowling (5-1-10-1). The Crick junior academy graduate, 18 this week, used all his age and wisdom to cunningly utilise the other opening batsman’s bat and shoe to upset the stumps. All part of the masterplan, of course. Nathan was unlucky not to get more wickets, as was Charlie (5-3-6-0), who kept it tight even by his high standards, showing no mercy when he ran the non-striker out having fallen over twice in the middle of the pitch after being sent back by Rocky. He’d have had a better chance of making it in if his shoelaces were tied together. Mike (8-0-33-1) found form and wickets again by bowling their number 4 with a beauty, while Dave produced very acceptable figures of 8-4-11-1, including the worst maiden over in history helped by Rocky hitting the would-be wides straight to fielders. Dave attempted to catch a ball smashed straight back at him in his first over (yes, it goes down as a drop), only for it to go through his fingers and hit him in the lower jaw area. I suppose if you were being philosophical, you’d tell him to take it on the chin. His wicket came when he clean bowled a batsman who took a massive swipe at the ball and forgot to keep hold of his bat, unintentionally providing Crick’s answer to the Highland caber toss. His bat is still travelling as I write and has been reported as an unidentified flying object in areas as far away as Coventry.
Wickets were tumbling at one end, but the other end was stoically held up by Rocky (28*), who by now had batted longer for Welford in one game than he has for Crick over the entire season. Steve was great behind the stumps as always, especially to Nathan’s express pace and bounce, and the fielding in general seems to be improving every week. Bobby (1-0-1-0) forced an over out as the heavens opened, but despite both sides being determined to see it out, rain sadly curtailed what would have been an excellent finish, with Welford poised at 69-4 off 27 overs. We’ll still claim the win though (just don’t tell the opposition).