Communication is an essential part of cricket. Most critical is the call as to whether to run or not between the batters in the middle, which as we all know is not as easy as it seems. A shouted instruction over 22 yards is a straightforward thing to do, it is the snap judgement as to whether to run and how many which is the complication. For captain, bowler and keeper there is the need for long range exchanges between each other and with fielders in the deep. Shouting your bowling and fielding plans across the field is not wise tactically and not good for the vocal cords, so sign language takes over. Flapping of arms and pointing of fingers indicates the direction a fielder should move, which is effective only if the fielder understands the gesticulations and, more importantly, is paying attention and not staring into space thinking what to have for tea. The formalised set of signals are of course between umpire and scorer, the most entertaining of which is the sign for four leg byes which to the non-cricketing observer looks like an attempt to revive a dance craze from the early 1960s. This form of non-verbal communication was sufficiently evolved that it was once common for anthropologists to be seen hanging around scorer’s boxes at league matches around the country preparing papers for the Royal Geographic Society along the lines of “Variations in the signalling of wides and no balls amongst the semi-nomadic tribes of South Derbyshire”. Since the early 90s, the sanctity of the umpire-scorer covenant has been sullied by the introduction of the third umpire and the need to communicate verbally using the radio waves so beloved of S. Marconi using what are termed “walkie-talkies”. The current England head coach, Baz “Brendon” McCullum, was spotted using the same such infernal device to communicate instructions to his batters during the recent Ashes Tour rather than use the more traditional method of sending the inevitably unused leg-spinner in the squad out to the middle with a drink or fresh gloves. This baffled many lovers of our glorious “summer game” as it hardly needs the deployment of modern technology to tell Zak Crawley to “stop wafting at balls wide of off your stump, you ****ing ****”.
On arrival at Newfield for out first game of the season against Inchcolm, we found that they has adopted walkie-talkies in an attempt to solve the perennial problem of league/social cricket scorers having to shout “bowler’s name” each time a new player takes the ball. It can also be used to clarify unclear signals from those pressed into service as umpires. With Cameron Blake a late call off through illness, Puneeth took over the captaincy and the handset. Kesh came in as a late replacement for Cammy so the Equals were at full strength as Puneeth won the toss and took the audacious decision to bat first. Srini and Dave Wood had the honours of being first to the crease and both were in fine form retiring on 26 and 27 respectively, Srini hitting three fours, Dave two fours and two sixes. Sam coming in at three out did both getting to 27 in only 13 balls. A very solid foundation of over 80 runs for no wickets lost had been laid, which was a good thing as Dave Greig, bowled for a duck, Shreyas caught after a quick 9 off 7 and Tom Doherty and Mark Sawyer each getting a single before being out caught and lbw respectively made for a middle order collapse. Puneeth (15) and Sid (10) dug in for the remaining overs undefeated giving E=MCC a very good and very defendable 137-4 from their 20 overs.
This was a total which could be defended, though the over the many years of playing Inchcolm we knew they have the ability to chase any total set, or to fall in a heap – much like E=MCC. At the start of the game the captains had agreed to play 10 overs from one end of the artificial strip them switch round. Sid had noticed that Inchcolm, on their home turf/plastic, had bowled their slower bowlers to open from the southern end and their faster bowlers after the switch to the north. Thus, the Inchcolm top order scored big, Neill, Ferguson and Miller all retiring not out with the only wicket in the first 10 overs Sam stumping Jones off Kesh for 19. Their run accumulation at the midpoint at not outstripped the required rate, helped by Dave Wood going for only 6 runs and Mark Sawyer for 10, and when the teams changed ends, so side E=MCC their bowling attack. Shreyas and Srini only conceded 6 runs for their overs, Srini bowling the ever solid Duncan Philp in a major boost towards victory. Tom bowled Dave Walsh on 2 bringing in Inchcolm captain Shane Venter (as Aussie as the name suggests). He got to 9 before a good throw from Shreyas at point saw Sam knock off his bails leaving Inchcolm needing three runs of the last ball for victory. Srini had caught a ball struck back at him in his first over on the calf and limped off the pitch to be graciously replaced by an Inchcolm sub, until he came back for the final over. Switching from left arm spin to right arm seam for the final ball of the match Gavin Hunter managed to find space to complete two runs before the ball was returned to Sam’s gloves and the game end in a tie.
There were many opportunities for E=MCC to claim a second win off the season, a second run taken one less wide bowled, but the Equals have been well matched to Inchcolm over many years, and a tied result brings joy to both sides. The result might have worked out differently had communication been better. When light is scarce, we play 8 ball overs, 8 balls bowled, wides and no balls called. Either side of midsummer, it is 6 legitimate balls, 2 bowling extras and everything else called dead ball. Which we were playing hadn’t been agreed at the start of the innings, and desperate attempts to clarify the position with the on-field umpire via walkie-talkie ended in confusion:
“That’s dead ball, over.”
“Press the button down to talk, then release to listen.”
“I thought I did, can you hear be Sid?”
Silence.
“End of over? Over”
“One ball left, over.”
“Over it is then…”
We should go back to semaphore.

Man of the match shared between Dave Wood and Sam for rapid hitting and excellent bowling/fielding.
Champagne moment: Srini returning from a sore one to bowl the last over.