Frampton win 'Le Crunch'

Frampton VETs made there bi-annual trip across the channel to take on the Vieux Loup ‘Old Wolves’ at the weekend and returned with a hard fought 10-0 victory.
The usual drag of the long haul coach trip was replaced by a luxury coach and then the Eurostar right into the middle of Paris , and the players and partners were treated to wine,champagne,beer and a selection of cheeses through out the journey .
On arrival at Parisis rugby club the party enjoyed more beer and the hosts read out the names of who was staying with whom … the highlights of this years ‘pairings off’ was Simon Bond being hosted by ‘Take that ‘ star Jason Orange and the obvious upset from the Frenchman chosen to host Phil ‘Bricktop’ Salvage .
Friday night is always free night so the Frampton party all went there separate ways with there hosts and all had different experiences . Weaves ,Chaps and Smither all enjoyed the Circus where Smither once again caused injury to many of the locals with his unique body surfing before falling asleep at the wrong table, whilst Barry Whitehead ensured his preparation for the big game was not affected as he had an early night after an evening babysitting .
Chaps, Bricktop and Weaves it must be said brought shame and embarrassment on FCRFC as there bodily functions let them down at certain times of the night , only Weaves really had an excuse for his actions as Smither had forgotten his nightly routine, and take him to the toilet ,before putting Weaves to bed.
The next day saw Frampton turn up fresh faced and ready for battle .Even the ‘hobo’ Mike West borrowed some kit from somewhere and rolled back the years . Barry Whiteheads pre match talk brought tears to the eyes of the Frampton players, but it was more fighting back tears of laughter rather than emotion.
The game was a battle from start to finish as both sides seemed to forget there friendship and proceeded to punch and kick each other for the whole game . Pete ‘Mr Homepride’Zaffiro , Smither and Kev ‘Hollow legs’ Long kept the scrum tight and the other forwards – Dave ‘Cliff Richard’Moulsdale , Whammers Tony Bleakman/Ricky Shepherd and Simon ‘Basildon ‘ Bond kept Frampton in the game .
With Weaves and Chaps at half back steadying the ship it was frantic stuff for the other backs of Dave John, Rhino Simon Goodwin , Pete’Thornbury’ Crawford Martin ' phil collins' Hill and Mike ‘Nobby ‘ Stiles .
Half time came and it was still 0-0. Phil ’Bricktop’ Salvage then decided it was a good idea to use the two French lessons he had at Hartcliffe Evening school to converse with the French referee and put him right on his refereeing at the rucks... This unfortunately had no effect with the referee as the only French language Phil could remember was how to order a strawberry ice cream and ask for directions to the post office.
The last twenty minutes saw Frampton take control with the introduction of Mike ‘sicknote ‘ Lynett ,Kev 'human cannonball'Atkinson , gary plant,tim phillips and man of match Brian ‘ Anger management ‘ Rides . A 5 meter scrum was pressured, Weaves scragged the scrum half and Ricky Shepherd ripped the ball from him to score.
Dave John then exposed some weak tackling to send Bondy away down the wing and he somehow showed a continental turn of pace , never seen before in England, to score the deciding try.
Special mention to John 'barack Obama Britton who kept the team hydrated , he has certainly come on leaps and bounds since becoming the first team bitch this season.
A great weekend was completed with a great night at the Parisis clubhouse where Frampton ate duck,sausage, more cheese and beans washed down with loads of red wine . Thankfully Weaves,Chaps and Bricktop managed to behave themselves on this night .
Roll on next season when Frampton host the Wolves in Frampton.