Ahmed's budding bats bid biting bowling abide in Ahmedabad bunsen battle

A sudden influx of adult players (mainly Indian graduate students at Surrey Uni) and a late call-up for veteran Datta following a drop-out led a bewildered skipper to field comfortably the most senior XI - by age, weight, and volume - the Guildford 4s have ever produced, on a pitch that Virat Kohli would have blushed at preparing.

Bolstered by axe-murdering newcomer Siddhant, whose batting in the nets since his arrival at the club has had fine judges passing such comments as 'bl**dy hell', 'wow' and 'jeez', Hussain had no hesitation in batting first on winning the toss on a boiling hot day. Having endured a nightmare start to the season, 3rd XI refugee Birtles had set his goal for the match no higher than a single to get off the mark, which he quickly overachieved by 400% with an elegant flick off his pads, and soon looked in calm control of the competent but unexceptional opening bowling. At the other end, the ultra-talented KK heeded the captain's exhortations to graduate beyond brutal cameos and clock up some serious runs, getting his head down and showing just how easily he can command the bowling at this level, calmly blocking the reasonable balls and flaying the bad ones to the boundary in the blink of an eye.

A promising start was all that this was, however, as the pitch was rapidly to demonstrate that seam bowling was a mere aperitif to the main event. The left-handed Birtles duly played forward to a gentle loosener from the veteran off-spinner deployed as first change, only to see it rag two feet past his edge. This set a pattern for the innings, as a series of four off-spinners, a leggie, and the opening off-spinner switching to slow left arm in a second spell, wheeled away for most of the 40 overs on a pitch that appeared to have been flown in from the recent England tour of India. Birtles defended carefully for an over or two before trying an uncharacteristic sweep shot in an attempt to seize the initiative, going too far across his sticks, and getting bowled round his legs. KK also played watchfully, occasionally unleashing his scything blade to give the opposition bowlers something to think about. But having survived a close shout from one of the seamers early on, he missed an off-break playing half-forward, and was hit on the back pad in line with off stump. Myles showed real class in weathering the storm, and was desperately unlucky to be bowled playing back to a sharply-turning grubber.

When Liam (having just played a majesterial flick against the spin through midwicket) played over the top of a beautifully flighted offie from a 12 year old Surrey age group player, it was left to Amit Datta, sometime 3rd XI umpire and father of Soham, to try and bat from memory in his first game for years, in support of debutant Siddhant. A brief glimpse of Siddhant in the nets had led onlookers to worry that he would quickly ruin the game against 4th XI bowling, which he might well have done on another day, but the contest was rather evened up by a treacherous pitch that saw gentle teenage off spinners bowling balls just short of a length only for them to fizz past his ears.

With Amit resisting bravely at the other end, and helping the occasional leg side ball down to the short boundary, Siddhant accelerated carefully, putting away the loose balls off the back foot and sweeping powerfully from well outside off. He looked set for a rapid century on debut when he rashly charged one of the returning seamers, hoiked across the line, and lost his off stump. With the team already on a mammoth score for such a difficult pitch, the tail were given full license to enjoy themselves. Akash and Chinmay provided aggressive cameos, including a memorable straight six by the latter to finish the innings. and Brendon played a little blinder, as repeated invitations to demonstrate that he could play the pull shot were RSVP'd to the tune of 36 runs.

In reply, Myles struggled a little to grip the slippery new cherry, which served to demonstrate that the opposition skipper was the main threat, as a couple of short balls were mercilessly dispatched across the fast outfield. Once he settled, however, Guildford's youngest player showed he was well up to the contest, as a series of beautiful out swingers delivered at a lively pace fizzed past the edge. A controlled spell at the other end by Fahd was rewarded with a piece of luck that probably settled the match, when a length ball spat at the opposition captain, which he could do no more than glove to the immaculate Siddhant behind the stumps.

With Epsom already a player down thanks to a bizarre hissy fit by one of their opening bowlers, and fielding 7 or 8 juniors to our 3, that was probably that. Their veteran and ambidextrous spinner provided extended resistance, but eventually missed trying to flick the rapid Akash across the line. Despite a splurge of long-hops as he continues acclimatising to his new action, KK was soon enjoying himself on a pitch that provided rather more assistance than he needs to be able to turn the ball, and would soon have been in jug-avoidance territory were he old enough to drink.

With Amit and Brendon pressed into action, we had soon polished off the tail and were celebrating sweet revenge for defeat against the same team only a week before.

Man of the match nominated by the opposition skipper: KK (again!), for his 32 and 4 wickets.