Some club myths surround this mysterious fellow; apparently he eats nothing but toast, and once slotted a bottle of wine in 6 seconds. Expect two or three times a games the line “What am I doing?!”, usually screamed at some prawny old man who has just anti-skilled his way through. Most cheerful guy in the club, nothing ever takes the grin off his face. BP L.O.L legend.

“Wasted enough of my life trying to beat him at a strawpedo, don’t even try it freshers.” – 2014 Club Captain, Patrice

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